In my mid-thirties, I noticed a faint noise in my left ear. Initially, it was barely audible, but it became increasingly louder over the following months. I visited my doctor, who examined my ear and informed me that a wax buildup was the likely cause. The noise was still there when the wax was removed. My doctor referred me to an ear, nose, and throat specialist at a London hospital. Several hearing tests and examinations proved inconclusive, and in 2008, I was diagnosed with tinnitus.
I attended a special needs school from the age of five to just before my seventeenth birthday, which was a harrowing experience. It is easy to recollect memories of my time at the special needs school; some are highly vivid. However, from the time just before I developed tinnitus, it was impossible to bring up the emotions and feelings associated with these memories. Essentially, the bridge between the subconscious and the conscious was broken; this meant that memories, thoughts, and emotions were isolated in the subconscious. Through hypnosis, I learned that we have to move beyond all that we see to all that we feel to understand ourselves better and not be frightened of this process. I wish to retell how I rebuilt this bridge, brick by brick, which returned me to better mental health.