Steven Aragon

Personal stories are powerful holding insight and meaning and offering encouragement. My own story has taught me life can really suck. But it has also shown me when we take the time to dig down deep and look at these negative life experiences and events, we can get past the facts as we understand them to the hidden meaning they hold. I share my model of reflection and transformation serving as the basis for my year-long journey looking back and extracting the lessons from the negative experiences and events comprising my story including abuse, death, depression, and career burnout. It now serves as my approach to life going forward. Based on the idea Suffering + Reflection = Growth, the resulting insights helped me revise and replace outdated, unproductive, and unhealthy mental frameworks in order to find renewed purpose, clearer direction, satisfaction, and happiness. These growth outcomes can be experienced by anyone willing to engage in the process and should be seen as gifts.

Grief is a multifaceted response to loss. It can’t be “fixed” nor do we ever get completely over the loss. We only get through it. But in order to do so, it is important to understand grief is not just about the permanence of the person’s absence. It’s what we have lost as a result of this absence. During this time, I share my 18-year experience dealing with my grief over the loss of my mom. I discovered the intense emotion was rooted in the loss of three distinct aspects making my mom my mom. Once I understood this about my grief, I was able to find productive and healthy ways of responding to each area of loss individually and uniquely when the related emotions would surface. I share how I arrived at this place so others can potentially find this same place for themselves. As a result, I now believe some of the best living by those no longer here can happen through the people they leave behind.

As I approached 50, I found myself excited for the opportunities being at this age and place in my life would bring. I was looking forward to turning 50. I knew what was important. I knew the type of people I wanted in my life. I knew what I fully valued, needed to be nurtured, and needed to be given priority thereby driving my future decisions. And even though I’m likely closer to the end of my life than I am the beginning, I’m excited about whatever years remain. In this presentation, I share what I’ve learned about living forward. Learning how to live forward is especially important after a significant life transition and/or transformation, which was where I was at in my life. It can be a scary place but by taking the time to determine what really matters and accepting some important facts of life, the best years can still be those to come.